So much of my thinking is a harmful activity. Putting aside simple problem-solving, much of the conscious thinking I do consists of grandiose fantasies in which I am a triumphant god, or bitter little scenarios in which all my enemies get their just deserts, or re-enactments of disputes, in which I actually get to say the things I think of saying hours after the fact.Things that usually start with "Oh yeah? Well--", or recollections of incidents that remind me that no one loves me/respects me/treats me decently/knows what I'm really like/will lift a finger to rescue me from this wretched cesspool/will stop bothering me/thinks I'm a genius/has an ounce of intelligence, etc. etc. Anyone who spent an hour or so monitoring my thoughts couldn't help coming away thinking that I'm a vile, loathsome quasi-human with delusions of grandeur and no self-esteem. What I'm banking on is that the same is true of the rest of you, or at least enough of you to cancel out some of the debt I owe humankind for being such a wretch. But I guess that's what grace is for, to use the Christian approximation of it. (pause) Hey, how about them Redskins, huh?