BIO

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Down here, you can't let a business suit, a distinguished head of hair, and a half-caf latte fool you. He could still be a good ol' boy underneath the veneer of faux civilization. He may have a pair of Iron Boy overhalls in the closet and a case of Sun Drop in the fridge. In case you never heard of Sun Drop (see how I cleverly worked in two different meanings of the word case? That's called onna monna pee-something), it's a lemon-lime concoction that whips Mountain Dew's ass and makes it run home crying to mama. If you engage one of these fellas in conversation, you're not going to hear a learned discourse on global warming, you'll more than likely get an earful of ain't it a shame they ain't a law that certain kinds of people can't go around showin' they underbritches in public.