FIRST SIGN OF SPRING

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What I'm all about:

1. If I find a wallet on the sidewalk, I will open it and laugh at the driver's license picture.

2. I will cross the street to avoid a pirate.

3. If I'm at a restaurant, I won't order any menu item that uses the word "zesty" to describe the dish.

4. I treat left-handed people just like you or I, for the most part.

5. Life, for me, is a bowl of Golden Grahams, but I'm out of milk.