I wish I had a nickel for every sketch I've done of a coffee-shop person on their laptop. Wait a minute, no I don't. If I rounded up 50 such drawings, that would gain me $2.50. Jeez. We need to retire that cliché toot sweet. Maybe if I said I wish I had a nickel for every oxygen molecule in the world, then we might be dealing with some real coin. But who would pay me for such a thing? And nickels are such annoyingly worthless chunks of matter anyway. At least pennies are humble. Tiny brown things, they know their place in the universe. Nickels are big dull disks of crapmetal. If you had a couple of dollars' worth of nickels in your pocket, your pants would fall down.

Look at what I've been reduced to. Ranting about nickels, like a minor-league Andy Rooney. The pressure to produce is getting too strong for me. Maybe I'll learn Portuguese and post in that language so you can't judge me. And no fair using Babelfish. Eu desejo que eu tive niquelar para todas as vezes aquele aconteci!