NON-NUDE COFFEE DRINKERS

One of the weighty topics examined by our convocation of art scholars last night was what was really behind the departure of Steve from Blue's Clues. Employing a strange new definition of the term "fact", several panelists claimed that the fact was that Steve was arrested for some unspecified criminal behavior and had to be dumped from the show. They were very adamant on this point, a resolve possibly buttressed by Belgian monk effluence. I was relieved to discover on Wikipedia this morning that the fact in question belonged to the sub-category of opposo-fact, much like the facts trumpeted by conservative cable news pundits. I say relieved because I still have a well-worn copy of Blue's Clues IV: Truncheon of the Warrior, and it's one of my prized possessions.