NEW ORLEANS MUSICIANS

If you don't think it's hard drawing a sousaphone, you've got another think coming. Getting those oblique ovals and their relationship to each other right was a bitch. Damn Dr. Souss for inventing them anyway! We saw these two in various places at various times over several days. It's not easy being a musician. Reminds me of a corny old joke, and although it's not recommended for someone my age to be telling corny old jokes, I'm going to anyway. I wonder if that's what getting old is really all about: you're well aware that doing certain things, such as farting in public or buying one of those fleecy things that's like a backwards bathrobe, perpetuates an unpleasant stereotype, but you just don't give a shit. Anyway, here goes:

Three men (of course) approach St. Peter at the pearly gates. St. Peter asks the first one, "How much money did you make last year?" "$150,000," says the guy. "Ah, you must be a physician," St. Peter says, in a smug kind of way because he takes pride in this particular parlor trick, "come right in. And you, sir," he says to number two, how much did you make?" "$300,000," number two says. "An attorney!" cries St. Peter, obviously happy to have found this diversion. Can you imagine how grindingly tedious it must be to play doorman to untold millions of heaven-goers every single day, while the really fun people are queued up at That Other Place down the street? I'll bet he sometimes wishes he believed in that version of the Rapture where a mere 144,000 show up, the downside being that as far as I can see, spending eternity with 144,000 of these jokers would be pretty much the opposite of Heaven. I mean, imagine the after-dinner small talk. You'd throw out "did any of you guys see 'Waiting For Godot'?" and 144,000 faces would turn to you blankly, and then after a few painful minutes would go back to lawn care or whanot. It would be kind of fun, though, if they spoke in tongues. I picture one guy starting, and then it spreading infectiously through all 144,000, like those YouTube videos of turkeys. Anyway, where was I? Oh yeah, so St. Peter says to the third guy, "How much did you make last year?" "$18,000," the guys says. "Oh yeah?" says St. Peter, "what instrument did you play?" Ah ha ha ha ha ha. *fart*