I shouldn't even go to painting night, and not because Artmark might throw his easel at me. Because a single 3-hour pose practically guarantees that I'm going to overwork it. This looks like the work of a morgue attendant who fends off boredom by assembling nude figures from random body parts. No offense to the model, Alli. She didn't look like this. This is the work of an artist who has only a glancing knowledge of how bodies occupy space and how gravity affects them. I should stick to slapdash sketches such as the following:

Now this, I can handle fine. This is Rafiel (I looked up the spelling) and that is a paintbrush lodged in his hat, and it wasn't a missile from Artmark, Rafiel stuck it there voluntarily. This I can draw. If I wake up in the morning and find the painting wasn't so bad after all, then I'll swear off those fucking martinis for good. But the odds are slim.